i dont no wat to say really. im just a plain simple [not so simple but weird] girl in a small city trying to stand out but cant. so many things are in her way but cant seem to express her self. life is sometimes so unfair. we did this unit in american literature about "fate/destiny". like you do think you were fated/destiny to be like this? do you think you could change your life. and other shits like that. you know having the serious tone while talking to an adult is annoying. recently i feel like breaking out of my so call "nice" shell and just start trashing around. but when i think about it, IS IT WORTH IT?. i seem to stop and let my life flow by as if its useless. the whole two pp up there sounded so depressing. but really i'm not a depress person or anything. i'm just very negative. maybe thats why a lot of people seem to dislike me because of my negatives and straight forwards. i mean i LOVE to lie but making up something for ones own happiness or others. which one would i scarafice, my happiness or theirs. idk. i would probably go with mine. i want my own happiness, idk if others are happy or not. its not my life its not like i can help them. sure. by saying hi or how are you doing might help them. but for a little while and that is it. i have always thought to myself, hey. since i get addicted to stuff really quick. could i get addicted to drugs or smoking too? but than i think again, it could kill me, so the only "kill me" thinking is preventing me from trying those things. its pretty awesome how this is working out. and i'm glad. sorry if those first couple of pp scared you. i'm just telling the truth. XD